How living separately from my partner of ten years has made our relationship even stronger
A woman who still lives separately from her partner of nearly ten years has insisted that it has made their relationship stronger.
Maya Kokerov, 27, based in the UK, started dating her boyfriend Kieran Nair, 28, when they were both attending The University of Warwick as teens.
After graduating from college they were planning to move in together when the COVID-19 pandemic hit and put those plans on hold.
'Lockdown happened and we were confined to our homes,' Kokerov explained during an exclusive chat with the Daily Mail.
'This limbo period lasted almost two years, and we started deciding that it's better to save up to buy a house together instead of renting.'
But saving up to get a home 'took longer than they thought' and as time went by, they realized how much they 'enjoyed living apart.'
Then, in 2024, they began discussing the topic of moving in together again, but when Kokerov's father unexpectedly passed away she decided she wanted to continue living with her sister and mom while they 'processed the loss.'
Maya Kokerov, 27, based in the UK, started dating her boyfriend Kieran Nair, 28, when they were both attending The University of Warwick as teens
Despite being together nearly ten years, Kokerov revealed to the Daily Mail that they don't live together - and she insisted it has strengthened their relationship
But despite their unusual dynamic, Kokerov insisted that she and Nair's relationship is just as strong, if not stronger, than most couples who live together.
Kokerov explained that she and Nair usually spend three nights together a week, and always makes sure to plan a 'mid-week date or two' in between.
'We also take lots of holidays/staycations and I sometimes spend longer periods at his place when we have the time,' she shared.
'He lives around 20 minutes away from me so we're able to see each other as much as we can while working. We also make an effort to plan new dates and activities.'
She insisted that living apart has a slew of benefits, explaining it has added 'excitement to their relationship' and has 'helped keep their spark alive.'
'Our intimacy seems to be stronger than that of many other couples our age who live together because it always feels very exciting when we have our long weekends to look forward to,' she dished.
'We feel like we're still in the "honeymoon" phase of the relationship when it comes to intimacy [despite being together for nine years].
Kokerov explained that she and Nair usually spend three nights together a week, and always makes sure to plan a 'mid-week date or two' in between
She said that because they have such a 'limited amount of real-life time together' even the most 'mundane things became more mysterious'
'This doesn't mean that we wouldn't still have our spark if we lived cohabited, but our limited time together has maintained our excitement to see each other and helped build romantic tension throughout the week.
'We also really appreciate each other and don't take each other for granted, making sure we're actively participating in our quality time (through dates, intimacy, conversations etc).'
She said that because they have such a 'limited amount of real-life time together' even the most 'munda0ne things became more mysterious.'
Another benefit is that they're able to 'maintain their hobbies, careers and gym routines.'
'I know we can do these things together, but I really find I don't prioritize some of these extracurricular things as much when I'm around him,' she added. 'With the extra time apart, I can stay focused on my goals.'
She vowed that living apart has stopped both of them from 'losing themselves in the relationship,' which happens to many couples.
'I feel like I have all the advantages of being a single twenty-something, but with the security of a partner,' she gushed.
However, there are some downsides, as she confessed that she does miss her beau a lot when days go by without them seeing one another.
However, there are some downsides, as she confessed that she does miss her beau a lot when days go by without them seeing one another
'If our plans to meet are ever disrupted, it can feel like we're in almost a long-term relationship (like if one of us gets ill or has to travel and we have to skip a weekend/week of seeing each other),' she shared.
'Sometimes, this can create distance in the moment, but it also keeps us so excited for our reunion.'
And while this has worked for them so far, Kokerov said they do plan to move in together down the line before they get married and have kids.
'For now, we're not ready for those steps (especially after my father recently passed), so we're living in the moment and enjoying the time we have as we continue working towards those milestones,' she said.
Unfortunately, she admitted that she's faced judgement from some people on the internet over their abnormal dynamic.
In response, she slammed the common belief that couples need to 'spend practically every second together.'
'Our response [to the haters] is that, even while living apart, we've managed to build a very strong nine-year relationship which has carried us through difficult times, like family tragedies, and kept our relationship very exciting and full of spark,' she stated.
