I was transformed into the perfect sorority girl by a rush coach who charges $20k... here's what happened
When I went through sorority recruitment, there was no TikTok, or 'RushTok,' where potential new members (or PNMs, as they're called) showed off $20,000 outfits, consisting of $1,400 Zimmerman dresses accessorized with thousands of dollars worth of Cartier jewels.
We never considered wearing 'athleisure,' as it was a category of clothing that did not exist yet, and white sneakers would have seen us laughed out of the process. Now, Alo sets and $500 beat-up Golden Goose sneakers are the norm as more women than ever are going through recruitment after TikTok made it look like a college must.
Almost 18 years later, I found myself getting ready to go through recruitment... or at least get a rush makeover, thanks to Trisha Addicks, the first official rush coach at the firm It's All Greek To Me.
To find out what being a sorority girl entails now, I arrived ready for a lesson while dressed in a conservative, short-sleeve navy Michael Kors mini dress paired with brown Steve Madden slides and a white woven bag with charms for a youthful touch.
Unfortunately, Addicks said, 'It's more business than it is rush.' She explained that, in today's recruitment process I would be surrounded by itty bitty floral sundresses and wouldn't feel as confident.
When I went through rush, I was told to dress like I was going to a house of worship, and we wouldn't even show our shoulders – so how much skin is too much now?
Her rule is 'if it's low cut in the front, then the back should be covered, and vice versa.'
Back then, Lilly Pulitzer was the ultimate brand to wear during recruitment, but these days 'you'll be automatically dropped if you wear Lily in some houses because it's so cliché,' and 'so southern sorority.'
Trisha Addicks, the first official rush coach at It's All Greek To Me, is releasing The Rush Bible to help potential new members everywhere learn the rules
Addicks said my outfit of choice was 'more business than it is rush' and that the rules had changed since I went through recruitment. Now, it's all about colorful sundresses with personality... but no Lilly Pulitzer
While Addicks firmly believes there's no reason to stack thousands of dollars worth of Cartier and David Yurman bracelets while clutching a $2,000 Louis Vuitton Neverfull, she knows PNMs feel pressure to wear name brands after watching hours of RuskTok.
'I've heard of people taking out second mortgages to rush,' Addicks revealed, although she quickly confirmed it's not any of her clients.
Elite parents who want to work with the University of Georgia graduate through her master package pay $20,000 for one-on-ones, and she usually takes on one client a year who's 'very high profile, at White House level.'
I first learned about the popularity of recruitment coaches while interviewing Kylan Darnell, the beauty queen turned influencer who has been named the unofficial Queen of Bama Rush since going viral for showing off $20,000 designer ensembles.
Darnell told me she saved money compared to people who spent '$4,000 off the top with a rush coach to teach them how to interview,' joking that they learned 'how to sit down and have a conversation.'
Addicks, a former Chi Omega member, does, in fact, charge hopeful moms and their stressed-out daughters $4,500 to get them ready for recruitment. It only costs $250 for the PNMs to go through 'mock rush,' a process where about 30 hopefuls line up outside of her Atlanta home to practice.
However, she offers much more than teaching 'how to have a conversation.'
Addicks does everything from perfectly curating their social media profiles to managing mothers' lofty expectations, and her team is with the teens for every high heeled-clad step of the way.
Kylan Darnell, the beauty queen turned influencer who has been named the unofficial Queen of Bama Rush, went viral for showing off designer ensembles and gaining millions of followers
I met Addicks in late August, during what she calls her 'Super Bowl,' or the busiest week of the year, when her clients finally go through recruitment after months of training.
The process usually begins senior year with an onboarding call with the mom and daughter, where she matches them with a mentor.
These mentors are from all over the country, and sometimes the clients will even fly to see them. Part of the mentor's job is also managing moms, who often have extremely strong opinions about what sorority their daughter should join - and can't understand why they would ever be cut.
The PNMs receive a guide to sorority recruitment preparation specific to the school they're attending – and Addicks will soon share that information with the world in her upcoming book The Rush Bible.
Then, it's time for a social media overhaul, which I would definitely need. Unfortunately, my Instagram has plenty of photos of me holding a cocktail or wearing a bikini, and both are forbidden.
'Sororities do not want to see you in a bathing suit, drinking, vaping or at a music festival half dressed,' Addicks said.
She will help perfectly curate a girl's image, which includes posting pictures of activities, family, and the holidays to 'give the sororities a glimpse into your world.'
But the Mad Rush podcast host isn't just getting intel from her mentors, who are 22 to 32. She also pays current sorority members for information to get the 'real scoop' and find out 'what's happening on the ground at these schools.'
Rush is a savage process no matter what year someone goes through it. The young women show up at every single sorority house, desperate for a bid to a certain one. Every day, the number gets smaller and smaller, until they're left with two choices.
Of course, if it goes perfectly, those choices include the house of their dreams and they 'run home' on bid day, eager to join their new sisters. If it goes poorly, there are tears for weeks. Some girls transfer schools in an attempt to join a better sorority.
Addicks gets plenty of phone calls from devastated moms who want to book her for sophomore year or need insight into what went wrong, citing everything from not being from the right location to not having strong enough religious beliefs.
One girl came to her after Auburn University recruitment ended and she hadn't received a bid. She had noticed everyone had scripture in their Instagram bio, and wondered if that's where she went wrong.
Addicks and her mentors often have to calm moms down, although she joked that she receives plenty of flowers as apologies after the parents go wild during the process.
When I went through sorority recruitment, there was no TikTok, or 'RushTok,' where potential new members showed off $20,000 outfits
When I visited Frolic Boutique and told them Trisha Addicks sent me they asked if I was 'one of Trisha's PNMs' after my rush makeover
Of course, some people accuse the recruitment coach of charging an astronomical amount. She's received plenty of pushback on social media, where people accuse her company of promoting 'paying for friends.'
Addicks said that feedback is 'flabbergasting.'
She explained that most of the young women who come to her have started charities or businesses and got top grades to get ready for college, so it doesn't make sense to 'drop the ball if you want to be a part of Greek life' by not preparing.
'I know we're expensive, but there's a reason we're expensive,' Addicks said. 'I mean, you break down the hours that we spend with these clients, our hourly rate is well below minimum wage.'
Still, she understands it's 'a big chunk of money to a lot of people,' which is why she's releasing her book to help both moms and daughters with the 'overwhelming' process, which she knows all about after not getting a bid her first year of rush.
'Rush is not for sissies,' she joked.
So, would I get a bid? I'd like to think so. After I visited Frolic Boutique – and told them Trisha Addicks sent me – I tried on one of her suggestions, a white ruffled mini dress emblazoned with hydrangeas. They asked if I was 'one of Trisha's PNMs.'
